


Just Cold

by messedupstargazer



Category: The Greatest Showman (2017)
Genre: Dad P. T. Barnum, Don't copy to another site, Fainting, Fever, Gen, Hurt Phillip Carlyle, Hurt/Comfort, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Posting Here Because I Can, Sickfic, Worried P. T. Barnum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-11
Updated: 2020-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:40:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22662640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/messedupstargazer/pseuds/messedupstargazer
Summary: Prompt: what about one where Phillip’s still training under Phineas (before Phineas beebops out lol) and he’s been complaining that it’s too cold all day even though it’s not and passes out mid-rehearsal and Phineas kind of calmly freaks out?
Relationships: P. T. Barnum & Phillip Carlyle
Comments: 3
Kudos: 150





	Just Cold

If Phineas was honest, he thought he would never understand high fashion. He hadn’t understood it when he was poor, and now that the circus had taken off, he still didn’t understand it.

“How can you wear that?” Phineas huffed, staring at his new young protégé.

Phillip frowned at him, unconsciously adjusting the long sleeves of his shirt. “What do you mean?”

“That outfit.” Phineas said. “I've seen Christmas presents with less wrappings than you.”

“I’m just cold, P.T.” Phillip rolled his eyes good-naturedly. “Unlike one of us, I won't be doing my office work ten minutes before we send it out. I think the heater in the office is out, it’s rather chilly.”

Phineas frowned, he hadn’t thought it had been that cold when he had gone in there that morning, but he supposed Phillip was in the office more often than he was. While the stage was where they both truly belonged, Phillip had a bit more to learn about the behind the scenes so he often stuck Phillip with more of the office work so the man could get a feel for them if Phineas suddenly couldn’t handle it.

“Put another heater on the list of expenses then.” Phineas replied. “Wouldn’t want our resident overdramatic to freeze. Nor you.”

Phillip nodded with a small smile, as if barely allowing himself to laugh at the joke.

When he'd first recruited the young man, he'd promised to give Phillip opportunities to laugh a little, and he hadn’t realized at the time exactly how much the young man _hadn’t_ laughed in all his life. If Phineas hadn’t married Charity, and understood a bit of the life she'd left to come live with him, he'd have been worried that Phillip _couldn’t_ laugh, no matter the joke.

“Hey, P.T.!” Charles’s voice caught Phineas' attention. “You got a minute?”

“Be right there!” Phineas called back. “You got it from here? Rehearsal’s in an hour. You're gonna practice in my place today, remember?”

“I've just got some paperwork to finish up.” Phillip nodded, holding the very manifest he'd come down to ask Phineas for. “Once I get through with this, we’ll be done for the next couple days so long as everything comes in on schedule.”

Phineas nodded and headed over to where Charles was. The problem had been a simple one, the leather aspect of the stirrup Charles used to get on his horse had torn, and needed to be repaired before Charles fell off the horse. Phineas got the leather repair kit, and set to work. He'd worked with leather nearly all his life, whether it was with his father for someone else’s riding clothes or repairing what little he had on the railroad, so the work was familiar, calming to him. To be honest, most of what was on his mind went quiet as he worked, setting the glue, painting the stain, and everything else needed to make sure Charles was in no danger.

“All right, that should do it.” Phineas said, and then realized Charles hadn’t been waiting for him as he expected.

He sought out the dwarf and found him sitting with W.D., Anne, and Lettie.

“The stirrup is fixed but don’t put any weight on it for a little while.” Phineas said, joining them easily. “I put the other one on, the one that’s not as well-painted. We can use that for rehearsal until the glue fully dries.”

“You know you could’ve just bought me a new one.” Charles said, a snarky smile on his face.

“Perhaps, but with my taste, I might not have had enough money to pay you when I was done.” Phineas shot right back, with an easy smile.

Charles and the others laughed.

“Aw, hell, come on, we’re gonna be late for rehearsal.”

They headed into the main ring, where just about everyone was gathered.

“Anyone seen Phillip?” Phineas asked.

Lettie easily pointed to the stairs Phillip was descending. This time, though, he came down with a scarf Phineas hadn’t seen earlier.

“You don’t look so hot.” Phineas said, taking in the pink cheeks and slight shivers across Phillip's skin.

“Not hot.” Phillip replied. “Cold.”

“Still that cold, huh?” Phineas sighed.

Phillip nodded, and Phineas could’ve sworn he could see the poor boy’s teeth chattering.

“Come on!” Phineas clapped his hands together. “You just need to dance for a bit, you'll work up a sweat in no time.”

Phillip reluctantly parted with the scarf and everyone fell in line for rehearsal.

“And a-five, six, seven, eight!”

Phineas easily led rehearsal warm-ups, so everyone could get adjusted.

“All right! Phillip, come take center stage up here with me!” Phineas called, feeling his blood thrum with the thrill of choreography. He'd never known how good he was until the circus, only dancing with Charity and his girls. And now he was going to teach Phillip.

Phillip’s pink cheeks joined him.

“You all right, Phillip?” Phineas asked, lowering his voice.

“I’m fine, P.T.” Phillip replied. “Still just working off that frost.”

Phineas nodded.

Phineas then started to explain the steps to Phillip, using more movement to show the young man. He had Phillip copy his routine, with the others dancing around them in time, and Phineas watched his footwork like a hawk. There was something off, something Phineas couldn’t place. He was sure after all this time, that Phillip would’ve gotten warmer, this couldn’t have been from a cold office. But Phillip hadn’t asked for a break, hadn’t asked anything, except for Phineas to repeat a couple of tricky moves.

“And when you turn, I want you to turn and I want you to face me, so don’t turn left, turn right, all right?”

He hoped Phillip was nodding because their backs were turned. As Phineas turned left, Phillip turned right, and _stumbled_.

“Phillip?”

Phineas had barely gotten the word out before Phillip's eyes rolled back in his head and his knees buckled, sending Phillip crashing to the ground.

“Phillip!”

Immediately, Phineas knelt down beside the boy, and his hands found Phillip's throat. While he found a pulse, he found a heat that sent a cold chill down his spine. He forced down the panic threatening to overpower his mind, and swallowed hard.

“I'm taking him to our office, someone get some water, cold water.” Phineas ordered, his voice steadier than his heart beating itself out of his chest. “I'll also need a thin blanket, _thin_ , and some cloth the size of a handkerchief. Rehearsal is cancelled for the day, I'll let you all know when we’ll start again, and can someone please send a telegram to my wife?”

Organized chaos ensued, as his circus followed his instructions, but he tried not to notice, focusing only on the rise and fall of Phillip's chest. He grabbed Phillip around the back and knees, lifting him into his arms, with Phillip's head resting on his shoulder. The heat that poured off of Phillip's skin unnerved him. He wanted to scream, to run, to come apart and become hysterical just as the others were doing below him but he couldn’t. Phillip needed him calm and cool-headed, no matter how much panic was flooding his system.

When he got to the office, he stopped. He couldn’t get the door open without his hands, and his hands were currently full of Phillip. Thankfully, Charles had been right behind him and opened the door.

“Thank you, Charles. Can you fetch the pillow Lord of Leeds uses for his stomach?”

Charles nodded and headed back down the stairs.

He set Phillip down on the couch, and started undoing the buttons on his jacket. With how bundled Phillip was, he'd expected the office to be chillier than it was. Seems a new heater wasn’t truly needed on the expense list after all.

“Stupid, stupid, stupid, you should’ve seen it.” He muttered to himself. “You should’ve seen the signs. Of course he wouldn’t stop, of course he wouldn’t ask for a break, you idiot.”

“Water coming up!” Lettie’s voice was strong, and several footsteps entered his ears.

He turned and saw Anne, Lettie and W.D. coming up with water basins.

“One is cool, one is warmer, and one is for drinking.” Lettie explained, pointing to each. “Make sure to start with the warmer, to adjust him, then the cool. We’ve got two more cold buckets coming.”

Knowing Lettie’s skills, he simply nodded and took the old cloth from Anne’s hands.

“We’re going to the telegraph office.” W.D. said. “Anything in particular you want to say?”

“Tell Charity what happened, that I've got a handle on it, but I don’t know how long I'll be gone.” Phineas said, dipping the cloth into the basin. “And tell her I'm not sure if she should come, because the girls will want to come and I'm not sure that would be a good idea.”

W.D. nodded, and placed his hand on his sister’s shoulder. The siblings exchanged looks, before Anne nodded, heading out with a promise to be back soon.

He wrung it out and placed it on Phillip's forehead. Phillip moaned, his eyes opening slightly.

“Phillip?”

Phillip's eyes were glassy and unfocused, but they managed to hold contact with Phineas.

Phillip's mouth moved but nothing came out but a small, wordless sound.

Phineas pulled the drinking basin to him, taking the cup from Lettie, and scooped some water into the cup. He put the cup to Phillip's lips, unable to trust him to see the water in front of him, but Phillip's lips parted and he was able to drink a bit of water.

“Phillip, can you hear me?” Phineas tried again, setting the cup aside.

“I hear.” Phillip breathed.

Phineas smiled slightly in relief. “That’s it. Phillip, how long have you been feeling sick?”

“Not sick.” Phillip slurred. “Just cold. So cold.”

“I've got the pillow and blanket.” Charles came in, shoving the pillow at Phineas in his haste.

Phineas easily slipped the pillow underneath Phillip's lax body, and then dipped another cloth in the warmer water.

“No, too cold.” Phillip’s uncoordinated hand swatted at the cloth, though he got nowhere near taking it from Phineas' hands. In that moment, Phineas was eternally grateful that Lettie knew what she was doing, anything colder and Phillip might’ve been caused actual pain.

“No, Phillip, you're too hot.” Phineas tried, mopping some of the sweat off his neck and face. “You have a fever.”

“No, no, can't get sick.” Phillip murmured, lost in the throes of the fever. “Steps, new steps, have to learn, have to impress him, can't disappoint.”

Phineas bit his lip, and took a glance toward Lettie and Charles.

“We’ll check on the water, see how it’s coming along.” Lettie offered, taking the thin blanket from Charles and setting it beside the couch. “Maybe we should wait for anything colder, wait until his system adjusts to the cooler water.”

Phineas nodded, grateful for their discretion. Phillip knew them well, and while they were friends, they all knew he wouldn’t want them seeing him like that.

“Perhaps one of you could fetch a doctor?” Phineas called as they left. “His fever is so high, we’ll need medicine, I don’t think this will be enough.”

Lettie nodded, and closed the door.

“Phillip, my boy, you didn’t disappoint me.” Phineas muttered. With the skill of a father taking care of a sick child, forcing down memories of a scared child taking care of a sick father, he got Phillip fully undressed, save for his undershorts, and placed the blanket over Phillip's shivering, searing skin. “You've never disappointed me.”

“No, no.” Phillip shook his head back and forth jerkily, as if unable to control his own body. “Can't let him down, can't disappoint, can't get sent away.”

“Hush, Phillip, shh.” Phineas whispered, gently stroking the sweaty hair of the young boy. “It’s alright, I won't send you away. You're not going anywhere. You belong here at the circus. With us.”

“Phin?” Phillip's voice was so soft, so small it nearly broke Phineas' heart in half.

“Yeah, it’s me, Phillip.” Phineas gently cupped Phillip's cheek. “I'm here, I'm not leaving you.”

“’M sorry.” Phillip slurred, his eyes watering. “Didn’t mean to ruin rehearsal.”

“You didn’t ruin rehearsal.” Phineas ran his thumb up and down Phillip's cheek, catching a couple errant tears. “You're sick, it happens to us all. It’s not a big deal.”

“Big deal.” Phillip murmured. “Wanted to impress you. Work needed to get done.”

“Hush, Phillip.” Phineas said, letting a bit of his Dad voice slip through. “Nothing is more important than your health. Getting sick isn’t disappointing me, you simply need a few days to rest. Nothing more. It’s nothing worth getting upset over.”

He hoped he was saying the right things, that Phillip would remember this when his fever broke, because he’ll admit, he was a little out of his depth with Phillip. While he considered Phillip to be close to him and his family, close to where his girls treated him like a new brother their father had brought home, to where Charity always seemed to make a bit extra food on the nights they had dinner so Phillip could take home some leftovers to make sure Phillip had good food in his pantry, there were still many pieces of Phillip that Phineas didn’t know. Pieces that might make or break any conversation he might have here with the boy.

Phillip stared in shock at Phineas. Phineas wasn’t quite sure if the boy was about to shove him away or burst into tears.

“Didn’t disappoint?” Phillip's voice was soft, small, like that of a child afraid of the dark.

“No, no, you could never disappoint me.” Phineas said, taking a risk and collecting Phillip into his arms, tucking Phillip's head into the crook of his shoulder. “Not a day goes by where you don’t impress me, where I'm not incredibly grateful that I ended up finding you, that you agreed to come to the circus with me. I have never regretted recruiting you, and every day I thank whatever higher power allowed you into my life.”

Soft gasps soon gave way to a flood of tears. Phineas started stroking Phillip's hair again, lightly dragging his nails every so often, trying to whisper words of comfort.

“It’s alright, Phillip, you're alright, shh, you'll feel better soon, I'm not leaving you, I'll never send you away, shh, you'll be alright, I promise.”

He wasn’t sure how long Phillip cried, but he didn’t mind. Phillip needed his shoulder and he'd have it as long as he needed it.

“Phin?”

Phineas paused. “Yes, Phillip?”

“I feel _terrible_.” Phillip's voice held an undertone, one Phineas barely picked up on, where he was ashamed of admitting this weakness, but Phineas wasn’t sure if this was Phillip's upbringing or because of the fever. While he hoped it was the latter, there was little doubt in the rational part of his mind that it was the former. “I don’t think I can finish rehearsal.”

“It’s alright, Phillip.” Phineas said, resisting the urge to drop a kiss to Phillip's sweaty curls as he would do one of his own daughters. “The only rehearsal you need to practice at now is asking for help when you're unwell. And I intend to make sure that in the future you feel you can come to me if anything else happens again. I'll not abandon you to shoulder this alone.”

Phineas adjusted their position, to where Phillip was still tucked into Phineas' shoulder but Phineas was more on the seat of the chair to ease the pressure on his knees and back.

“You'll stay?”

“Always.” Phineas admitted. “Get some sleep, Phillip. I'm not going anywhere.”


End file.
